Anger is, without a doubt, one of the harshest, unhealthiest, and most painful emotions there is on this planet. It is literally the absence of Source/God, and, in turn, is an emotional thought form of decay and pain which contributes – and attracts – the same if we focus and internalize it too long.
Whether we seek to heal from Cancer, heal our skin, or create a life we love, acknowledging and releasing this anger is a critical part of the journey, one that is usually far from fun to deal with.
But it is necessary! Like all emotions, when we store hatred and condemnation in our heart and in our energetic body (affecting organs and systems on this physical plane), manifestations of imbalance eventually show up.
That’s why EMOTIONS are an important part of the 4 Facets of Healing, and one of the reasons ALL holistic centers should – if they do not already – pay attention the emotions and psyche of the individual they are working with.
Naturally, as Source is perfect (and you are an extension of God/Source – if you’re not yet aware) when you eat healthier, move your body, and start thinking higher-vibrational, more optimistic thoughts, negative thought patterns and pre-conceived limitations (shaping your worldview) come up.
This is part of the ‘Healing Crisis’, and it has to be worked through (and released) for healing to take place.
Health is wholeness; Sickness is separation (ego – anger).
You are not meant to SUFFER and to hold onto unsavory emotions. You are meant to live in the light, surrender to love, and experience an effortless, creative and expansive existence – if you so choose.
So, that’s what we first learn when we begin to work on ourselves (which is a non-stop journey, mind you).
… But how do we deal with OTHER peoples’ emotions – specifically anger – when we’re getting started on this path?
I’ll admit, it is not easy – or at least it hasn’t been for me.
I’m in a position where I write a lot about controversial topics, and the anonymity of the internet has given may people false bravery to spout hateful opinions.
At first I used to take it personally: “What did I do? How could I have done it better? Am I really horrible? Am I a bad writer? Should I give up?”
And this caused me to spiral into various forms of depression.
I started dreading writing because I didn’t want to be made fun of or have people send hate mail (someone once told me in an email they hoped I dropped dead regarding an article about animal rights)…
And I let this control me for a very long time.
Until… One day, while writing, Spirit spoke up and said:
“Nothing they say is ever about you. The content you write is a trigger for them about something they must work on.”
So, of course, I’m not a perfect individual and I do make mistakes now and again, but I had to realize that their anger was not mine, and was something they need(ed) to work through.
This changed things quite a bit.
I had to tap into my true integrity and question, “Am I doing this work in alignment with my highest being, and is it true?”
Truth is subjective, I get it. But if it is my truth, then I cannot be doing anything ‘wrong’ – especially if everything is shared in kindness.
If I am doing my best, I am not judged on others’ perceptions, but my relationship with Source and what resonates.
This isn’t – and will not be – the same with other people, which is why we ALL have to stop judging each other so much and fearing judgement from others.
We are different beings of different backgrounds with different opinions. Let’s accept it! It’s okay!
In regards to how this might translate into your life, perhaps you fear judgement from a family or friend. You might be interested in a certain topic or want to do something out-of-the-norm with your life, but are sure they won’t understand.
Well, guess what. They likely won’t.
But fear of judgement is something we must get over as humans because it is a trap that keeps us living uncomfortable, unhappy lives when all we want to do is expand and create!
So, my advice regarding fear of judgement (and the pre-cursor to anger in others that might be experienced) is to live authentically (are you living and acting with integrity, doing YOUR best at all times?) and be kind at all times.
If you are living YOUR truth and sharing your gifts, talents, and aspirations with the world out of kindness, other peoples’ anger will NEVER have anything to do with you. It is their reflection coming up, and you need not fear how to handle it.
The reason many of us fear judgment is because we want to please others.
Truly, there is nothing wrong with wanting to help others, but when it’s based on making THEM happy, it is a conditional relationship and that is not beneficial for anyone involved long-term.
If someone is dependent upon YOU acting a certain way for THEM to be happy, that is conditional love – not the kind of relationship you want to be in.
Vice versa, you may be inhibiting their growth – and your own – by conforming to outdated beliefs and ways of living and, therefore, are living a ‘fake’ life. This can only go on so long, and then your ‘life’ will eventually crumble in some ways as you realize you’re not living your purpose and are not fully happy.
That’s why you really need to OWN your authenticity now and not fear judgement from others.
If someone is angry at you for living your truth, love them as you wish they would love you, and FOCUS on your passion or the work/play that inspires you into happiness. They will eventually let go of THEIR fears (causing them to be angry), and both of you will benefit immensely.
The title of this blog is “How To Deal With Other Peoples’ Anger”. That’s kind of misleading because it is NOT your job to deal with other peoples’ anger.
What IS your job is to deal with how you RESPOND to other peoples’ anger, and a lot of that is rooted in trying to people-please and appease them.
If you live authentically and act out of kindness, you can be SURE their anger is not a result of you (and never is) – it is them coming face to face with the limitations and conditions they’ve placed on people or circumstances in life, stuff they need to let go of.
Wish them love, send them light, and do your best to SHINE as an EXAMPLE.
That is the best thing any of us can do in this very confusing – though brilliant – life.
I hope this article helped! Please comment your thoughts below and share this blog post!